Sick Sentences

These are the sick sentences:

The ball came towards Richie. He jumped into the air. He held out his hands. He was excited. It was up to him. 

Here are my better sentences:

Richie Macaw turn around he could see the rugby ball heading towards.

 He jumped up High to grab the bal. He caught it and ran fast as could. He  scored. The crowd went wild.

His teammates came to him giving him a pat on the back.

He was extremely excited.

Show not Tell

 1) Tell: Sander was happy

Show: Her lips stretched wide revealing all her white teeth farming a smile. 

her face turn pink us her Sparkle with excitement and Joy.

she jumped into the air with heaps of excitement.   

I could tell that she was happy because she had a big smile on her face              

 2 )Tell: Brandon was angry

Show: his eye  turned boiling red.

his  cheeks went bright red.

his face look like a chameleon.

even made that angry sound.

                                                                                                    

3 Tell:t rowdy is sad
he his big tears dripping down his eyes.
he his a big frown.
tears bursts out of his eyes.


Blog you later

My sir Edmund Hillary drawing

Hi it's Finley. Here is my Sir Edmund Hillary he is climbing Mt Everest.
Blog you later Finley Bye